EA unveils Quidditch video game at E3 conference

The logic is perfect, isn't it? EA, the sports leader in nearly every category known to humankind, teams up with...itself, the leader in acquisitions of major licenses, to create Harry Potter's favorite sport, Quidditch. Seems like THE perfect equation. The only problem is first admitting you have no idea what in God's name Quidditch actually is. Is it an old English game with Quids? An acronym for squid sandwich? A Cockney for Quit itching? Throw us a frickin' bone here!

All right, joke's up. We actually know what all this Quidditch stuff means, we're just being dorks. And thankfully, or at least, rightfully, EA is bringing the flying game of witches and wizards to every system under the sun this fall.

There are two "Beaters" (please don't ask us to define that) who control the deadly Bludgers (blue badgers, naturally), the Keeper (as in goal keeper, yeah, it's simple), and the Seeker. What does the Seeker do? DUH! He chases the Golden Snitch (usually we refer to snitches as a jerk, but here somehow a snitch is "golden"...don't ask us...), which must be captured to end the match (which earns you 150 points). Score 10 points and you win. Good job, Harry!